You know what this means!

The woodpeckers are tapping on the side of my house looking for a good place to make a hole, the magpies are back and taking command of the neighborhood, a robin perches on the branches now and then to check out the surroundings we share, the snow remains only on the north side of the house where it successfully hides from the sun even now, the temperature is 62 degrees.

And the crocus are out.

We made it!

It worked

OK, so I learned to ski from a book.

So a lot of people over the years have laughed out loud over that, but it was "Ski in Six Days" by Billy Kidd and it got me going.

And it's better to learn from a book than from a boyfriend standing over you saying "see how easy it is to turn?" "just lean into the hill" "put pressure on the outside edge" and other things that don't really help when you're sitting at the top of a mountain with nowhere else to go but what appears to be straight down and no way down that doesn't look slippery considering what's attached to your boots. Because that's where boyfriends take most of their friends after teaching them how to put their skis on -- to the top of a hill on a run that's marked intermediate but they're sure is more like a beginner slope and in the belief that you'll get the hang of it just by watching how easy it is for them.

So that's why I'm glad I learned to ski from a book.

No pressure.

Nothing steep until I chose it.

Nobody telling me to just "go like this" or that the slope was "not bad once you get past this first part."

The first day, according to the book, was just put the skis on and walk around at the base. I lumped it together with the second day which was snowplowing. There was a day for stem christi and a day for parallel skiing and one for moguls. And since that doesn't add up to six days, I guess I forgot one.

But I learned to ski and by the time I skiied with my boyfriend, he could take me to the top of the hill and give me pointers and I didn't freak out.

That was 30 years ago.

That boyfriend, now my husband of 29 years, and our four kids ski together. And while I'll never be as fast or tackle slopes as steep as they are and do, we can at least ride the lifts to the top of the mountain together.

Thanks to Billy Kidd.

I don't get it

Why does she stand there?

The woman who just found out with the rest of the world that her husband used call girls -- women he didn't even know well enough to like well enough to rationalize a decision to be unfaithful -- women he just pre-meditatively arranged for and used. Why does she stand there while he confesses and resigns?

Is the humiliation not yet great enough? Is the anger already passed? Is his need for support greater than her need for privacy?

Somehow it doesn't even appear as strength. It appears more like one more woman being used.

We were surprised when Hillary did it. And then we turned on her.

Is standing by an unfaithful husband in those first raw moments saying you knew it all along or didn't mind it so much? Or is it saying you are more forgiving and accepting than the rest of us would be.

My guess is Hillary's road would have been easier if she had left the man then and there. She would have been the victim, the martyr. She would have had sympathy and support and left behind the baggage he brings to the relationship even to this day.

Sure, relationships can be healed as time goes on and trust is rebuilt.

But in those first, fresh, painful moments, nobody would mind if the grieving woman stayed in her room with the blinds drawn and the phones unplugged.

In fact we might prefer it.

It's the least he deserves.